Modern Gentleman: The Better Back Rub

You have to know your anatomy. And listen…

The first thing is oil. Any good massage oil from a health-food store will work. Some favorites from around the home: jojoba or grape-seed. Make sure that the recipient is in a comfortable seated position in front of you. Place your hands on her shoulders and grab the trapezius — the big muscle that leads from the neck to the shoulders, the one everybody loves to have rubbed. Shake it a little bit back and forth. Squeeze it, rub it. Push up against the neck a little bit and move down toward the shoulders. Don’t be afraid of using too much pressure. If your partner moans or says, “That’s the spot,” stick with it.

Then move on to the shoulder blades. Pay particular attention to the space between the shoulder blades and the vertebral column. Use your fingertips to rub back and forth between the vertebral column and the shoulder blade. Be vigorous. And whatever you’re massaging when she says “That’s the spot,” stay on that spot.

Run your thumbs down each side of the spinal column. Push them into the back and move all the way down without touching bone. Never massage bone. Go up and down one side and up and down the opposite side.